I SWEAR I AM REALLY LOSING MY MIND. I’ve been bitten by the holiday bug and I wanted to actually make stuff. Last year, it was ornaments, bags of popcorn mix, and chocolate covered pretzels. This year, it was many things. Scarves. Cookies. More Scarves.

First up is the oatmeal/chocolate chip/M&M cookies Ashley and I made for everyone.

Best parts of making these were:

• Niel (Ashley’s husband) asking if we’d made them already. We hadn’t, but to all recipients, I promise I’ve made them now, they are edible, and what’s more, they taste GOOD.

• Niel wondering if we cut up his shirt to make the lid toppers. Why yes, sorry to whoever got the sweat patches! Really, no T-Shirts were harmed in the making of these treats.

• Aspen coming in and looking at the bowl of M&M’s and declaring “Yummmm” with such longing, that we had to give her some. Which she ate with her back to the door. I could almost hear her thinking, my preciouses….

Now on to the sweaters. Not much story here. Just knit, knit knit until my hands want to fall off and run away like the hand from the Adams Family.

Now my nieces will be warm, and bellies all over Utah County will be full of sugar thanks to me. I just worry what crazy craft I’ll come up with next year!

BECAUSE I KNOW YOU WILL ASK, no, I am not done posting about Christmas. Not even close. Maybe in two or three posts I will have exhausted my efforts, give up and start posting about the size of my pants. Maybe. Maybe not.

So here’s the run down. Eddie. Eight-year-old Boston Bull Terrier.

Eight-year-old little you-know-what that torments us with staring at the ceiling lights, farting on people, barking to no end, and just being crazy in general. So imagine, you add Eddie with people, Christmas music, lights (oh no, the lights!) and a ton of presents. . .and here is what you get.

WHAT IS THE BEST PART ABOUT CHRISTMAS? I thought to myself on Christmas Eve. Awaiting me at my parents house was a pork chop dinner, with mashed potatoes and a tall one – of milk that is. We had a night of viewing The Grinch (which is so much better on that night than any other time of the year) while the snow is gently twirling down on us outside.

So what is the most important part of it all? Is it the magical feeling that you get? The fact that everyone gets along for one night in the year? Waiting to see what Santa threw down your chimney this year? Or the feeling of timelessness as the powder drifts lazily from the sky? Maybe it’s time off work so you can spend quality time with family? Can it be the look on their face when you give the perfect gift?

I think it’s a combination of everything. Nothing is more important than family. So from my family to yours, here is a photo journal of our little Christmas.

Christmas Eve:

My parents tree. Forgive the blurriness. I don’t have a good excuse for it.

Some gifties for the good girls (no boys in this family other than Dad).

Probably my favorite decoration of my moms is this light up deer.

And. . . a closeup of the best foil wrapping paper ever.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a great night!

DEAR INTERNET, I HAVE COME TO INFORM YOU that after this post, you’re way of viewing me and my life will drastically change.

Forever.

And no, Vanity Vain is not a post even related to Danity Kane (even though my name is Aubrey. The girl in the band isn’t worthy of the name).

It’s not that I like making a fool of myself, or that I want to post scary pictures just for the fun of it. Besides, Halloween was two months ago. The reason I’m posting these godawful pictures is so everyone can know the painstaking processes that us girls go to just to get the look we want. And no, it’s not pretty. This is going to be a step-by-step picture documentary of how I do my hair.

DUE TO THE UNATTRACTIVE NATURE OF THESE PICTURES, VIEWER WARNING IS ADVISED.

First picture starts off after my shower. I put a gob of gel in my hair and put it up like this:

Then I get dressed, watch some TV, eat some cereal and come back to the bathroom. I take my hair out, and flip my head completely upside down. After a few Beavis and Butthead-like head bangs, I’m ready for the blow dryer. When I’m done, here is what that little beauty does (before I’ve even tweaked it):

Someone, get that girl a hair brush and a straight jacket, STAT!

Thankfully, I’m not quite done. Now I have to spray my bangs back:

Is it just me, or do I completely look like Cruella De Vil right there? I even have the white highlight. Go Disney!

Next step is to pin hair up in the middle, add makeup, and take about fifty more pictures just to make sure it looks good:

Overall look

Closeup of the makeup

Finally, we’re at the last step. Add jewels, more hairspray, glasses, and another spray of Suave just to be sure:

I’m done, but wondering why I’m not looking directly at the camera in the last picture.

There you have it my folks. The completely unglamorous. I, AubreyMo, have posted the impossible. I’ve posted pictures of myself that were completely and utterly shocking. Now, to be fair, some shots I just can’t take by myself. Like one where my head is upside down with a ten pound blow dryer attached to it by little poky things. Or the one where I think I have to have my mouth open to apply mascara. But let this be a lesson to everyone. If your girl isn’t looking at her best, just wait!

IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING RIGHT NOW. Correction, make that two-thirty. Why, oh why am I still up, playing on my macbook and surfing the web? Well, I’m glad you asked. My new room mate is making it rather hard to sleep. So instead, I’ll recount what I’ve done for the day.

Tasks:
Manage to live through the drive home – check.
Pick up indoor rabbit cage – check
Clean cage – check
Add one adorable, floppy eared goofball of fur to the cage – check
Shovel driveway, do dishes, wash laundry, wrap presents, shop for more presents and wrap them? Um, can I get a rain check? Those are still a work in progress.

Here’s.

The.

Deal.

Rabbits make for noisy, messy room mates. I took pictures of the cleaning/cage setting up process. I should’ve taken one just five minutes after I had it all done pretty and he’d messed it all up.

Take neat picture of cleaning the cage.

Photo of me dreading to finish cleaning the said cage.

Add bedding. Run hands through it for a half hour for its cheap, relaxing quality.

Top it all off with water bottle, food, hay, litter pan with Kitty Litter
(that he neglects to actually USE)

Add Houdini to the cage. Hope he doesn’t escape! No that’s not really how he got his name. That’s a completely different story.

And now to top it all off. . .take the freakiest picture of an eye I’ve ever seen.

Houdini, I know you don’t read, but please understand at least this: I could have left you out in the frigid cold all winter, with me only making trips to feed your insatiable hunger, and break the ice out of your water day in and day out. It would have snowed. And since you tend to use your BED as your litter box, I’m sure it wouldn’t have been very comfortable.

And to be honest right now, having you outside doesn’t sound half bad again, since I’ve been listening to you digging out all your precious litter I carefully arranged. Give it another twenty minutes and you’ll get bored with that, and move to chewing the bars like a madman trying to break out of a top security prison. I’m sure I’ll move your cage around the house at least five times, trying to find a spot where I can’t hear you jumping about.

But noooooo . . .despite the fact that you have a double coat of fur, regardless of the fact that you beat Bigfoot when it comes to how much fur-per-square-inch you have on the bottom of your feet, and ignorant to the history books that tell me your ancestors have lived, do live, and will continue living outside, MY NURTURING INSTINCTS MADE ME HAVE TO BRING YOU IN. Dang rabbit, you better love me, that’s all I gotta say!