FOR SOME BACKGROUND, you know that I’ve always loved pets, which means I’ve owned anything I could get my hands on. Currently I have two parakeets, a dwarf hamster, a talking dog, and two rabbits. Everything lives in my apartment except the rabbits, some punk kids came around and started letting them out of my yard so I had to move them to my parents house.

Ashley recently caught a rabbit and tried to give it to me, and I immediately started listing the things she shouldn’t feed it. What can I say, I am a walking index of pet advice. It’s kind of pathetic really. I aspired to be a vet, and when that wasn’t possible I looked into being a vet tech. I found a local program, but they wanted $41,500 in TUITION (meaning, not including books) for two years of school which would certify me to spend the rest of my life cleaning cages and taking “temperatures” for roughly $12.75 an hour!

Uh, no thanks.

So here I sit, telling her what not to feed Chester the Rabbit (or Sweetie as Aspen calls him) and I…well…read it for yourself. Let’s just say I’m a PET expert, not a food or spelling expert.

Ashley:
i tried to give the rabbit we found to mom, she wouldn’t take him and says shes giving you your rabbits back someday

Aub:
the rabbits i can’t have at grams because kids let them out, and mom/dad shouldn’t have to care for them.
haha yep those are going.
i dont care about the black one, i’ll miss my brown one tho

Ashley:
is this the same aubrey that wanted to be a vet tech and save baby birds along the freeway?

Aub:
bite it

Ashley:
Glade (her cat) LOOOOOVED The rabbit. he was totally rubbing up against him

Aub:
what a fag (Sorry. You’d have to meet Glade to understand that. He’s antisocial, his best friends are a pair of raccoons and he hates the daylight. You can’t help but make fun of him.)
dude don’t feed the rabbit alvacados or tomatoes, it’ll kill.

Ashley:
altho the rabbit was last seen at the neighbors house–the neighbor called me last night and says “do you have a rabbit”? um…we brought one home yesterday
alvacado???
alvacado??
answer me
dont google it.
alvacado

Aub:
avacado?
heck I dunno.

Ashley:
avacado.
much better
you should try ALvacado’s theyre delicous.

Aub:
bite it

Ashley:
well they are

My favorite part? How she has to tell me “don’t Google it”.

She knows me well.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY LOVELY SISTER, SAM.

She is older by three years, which means she’s turning Twenty Three today! And look, she doesn’t even look any older up close. . .

I lived with her for a year when I was being rebellious against my parents. It really taught me a lot about what a relationship with a sister should be, and sometimes what it shouldn’t be. We were literally joined at the hip at her house and did everything together. Vacations to Vegas, horse riding competitions in Price, working together up the canyon to clean the mansions that she does, eating the same food, wearing the same clothes (she used to steal mine out of the washer, might I add. She could’ve at least waited until they were dry!).

Every night, Sam, her husband Mark, Dale and I would meet up at the arena and just ride. Those were the best times of my life, up there on the back of a big strong horse just trotting around with Sam.

Or we’d catch baby kill deers and then realize that this is the best picture of us of all time.

Happy Birthday Sam. Love ya!

Post note: I look like the Hunchback of Notre Dam. Just sayin.

IT STARTED WHEN A LITTLE ROBIN LANDED ON OUR WINDOWSILL AT WORK LAST MONDAY. We thought it was cute when he started hopping up and down. Well, it was cute for about five minutes until we realized that the bird, or “Seymour” as we call him (get it, see more because he can see himself in the window, or at least that’s what we assume) has kept at this for four days now. So Ryan, our creative director made this video and sent it to us all.

If anyone wants to adopt Seymour (also known as SHOOT HIM WITH A PAINTBALL GUN) please feel free to let me know.

Also…if you have a real cat that can scale twenty feet walls, we would like to offer he/she/it a job. My cat has currently traded sides -  he’s a lover not a fighter.